Milwaukee wedding photos by Emily Johnson Photography on WedinMilwaukee.com

Emily Johnson Photography

So I did it!  I walked down the aisle, said my vows, celebrated with my closest family and friends and became a married woman. The nine months of planning led to this one special day. I couldn’t have been more pleased—and sad at the same time.

Everything looked beautiful together: the flowers, the cake, the bridesmaid dresses, menu cards and more. As the clock struck midnight and the band played the last song, I suddenly realized the day I was looking forward to for so long was over. In fact, as I thanked our last guest, I wondered, Now what?  Then the sadness started to creep in.

After our wedding, my new husband and I went to Door County for a few days. We decided to save our honeymoon to Hawaii for after the holidays. After our trip to Door County, I returned to work and reality struck. All I wanted was to have that magical day back. I wanted to relive it one more time. I wanted to put my dress back on.

Thoughts went through my head of what I would have done differently. I started to get mad at myself for forgetting to get a few photos with friends—the night goes so fast. I also asked myself, What do I do now? I had put so much time and energy into planning my big day that I wasn’t quite sure what to do with myself.

I started to talk to friends who’d also been newlyweds and found we shared a lot of the same feelings immediately after our weddings…the post-wedding blues as we call it. To have so much excitement and buildup and then for it to all be over with at the snap of your fingers was difficult to handle.

Friends and family also started calling me by my new last name, and that was even scarier. Who was I now? Who was this person? I remember changing my last name on Facebook and looking at my page thinking, This is weird. My identity was changing.

Then there was the weight gain. As most brides say, the weeks leading up to your nuptials, the weight seems to just fall off due to stress and high emotions. Well, after the wedding the weight seems to have no problem coming back on!

So where am I now? Well, it’s been nearly three months since my wedding. Once I got my photos back, I started to feel better. My new husband and I are going through the process of ordering our album and writing our thank-you notes, which brings us back to our wedding day and puts a smile on my face. During our honeymoon, I realized I’m still the same person, even with a new last name (which I still haven’t technically changed yet—that is also on my to-do list). Having spent time with my husband alone in an island paradise made me so thankful for him and for our relationship. I began to realize that our wedding day will always have a special place in our hearts, but we need to focus on us, the future and the exciting things we have to look forward to—together.

Here are a few tips for future newlyweds:

  • It’s OK to feel sad after your wedding day. Almost 90 percent of my friends felt the same way I did, so take comfort in knowing you are not alone. What really helped me was going to dinner with some of my friends to talk through my feelings, as they understood and had once been in the same spot.
  • Don’t focus on your regrets. It happens. Everyone has something they wish they would have done differently at their wedding. So you forgot to thank someone or you forgot a photo with a friend—they won’t remember. All your guests were there to celebrate you, and they had a great time!
  • Plan past the wedding. Since we were planning our honeymoon for a few months after our wedding, I focused on our fun, relaxing vacation, which helped. We also are building a house in Cedarburg, so I started to focus my energy on all the challenges that entails, which is an entirely different blog!
  • It’s OK to share your feelings with your husband. He may not understand completely, but he  might try and find ways to cheer you up. For example, taking you to dinner or planning a surprise date night.
  • Look at your photos when you get sad. This really helped me. Every time I look at them, I smile.

Trust me, as time goes on your sadness will heal itself. You’ll begin to plan the next stages and goals for your life as a married woman. One of mine: I am going to wear my dress on our first anniversary!

Have any other newlyweds had similar feelings? Please share!

**Editor’s note: Thanks to Jessica Vollrath Huebner, our real-life “Tiffany,” for sharing her experiences with us!** 

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Tiffany (7 Posts)

Tiffany, Wed in Milwaukee's bridal blogger, shares her experiences as she plans her wedding in the city. Names have been changed to protect the innocent—and guilty!



Tags: ,